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Dear Web,

Today, I don't know where to go, what to write, what to do. I've done all the things I've wanted to do today. And I can feel things slowing down as I face the stillness where I feel this insecurity. And the anxiety is just below the surface again. My neighbor invited me to come over; she knows why we moved to this new house, but we've not really connected. I feel awkward, unsure socially. Just inept. So, I've kept to myself in this facing of the stillness. This must be another layer of what it looks like to be alive but facing death. Not my death, of course, but Death in its undeniability, its refusal to negotiate. It's refusal to be affected by anything I do in my life and living. No matter what. Death has taken Phoenix.

I have no inspiring words for you or myself. The most accurate representation of my web log today would be a blank page, a blank white page with no ink in sight.







Melissa